Finding Your Style
The man makes the clothes not the other way around
We go again,
I have committed to the honour of someone who cares about style. It’s really been a part of me for as long as I’ve known. There are Two things I will always Remember;
1) You look the part you act the part
2) The man makes the clothes
These two comments have reigned true for my entire understanding of clothes, perception, style, confidence, fashion, luxury & attitude. Depending on what I wear I get treated a certain type of way, respect and esteem is earned depending on amount of thought is put into an outfit and amount of style one exudes while wearing it. That’s said for a person who knows what he’s doing when he’s building a catalog and developing a wardrobe fit for his style.
Dress like a man act like a man
This and many other variations of the phrase were told to me as a young man starting secondary school, in a Church of England you rise when a senior staff member comes in the room; have your tie straight; your blazer clean; and sit when told. This way of learning respect for elders was instilled in me with a passion, when you tie it in to everything else you learn about being a man it’s uncompromising and unwavering. Simply made sense, so who was I to question? Great question, the answer is – Not Your Typical, that’s who I am.
When I realised this was a big deal was when I would wear an Anorak with a big scarf and my hood on in a cold autumns day on the way to gymnastics and the difference in the way I was treated in my suit and in my anorak. Noticing the attire makes the perception and the attitude amplifies it. One of the only ways to not get treated like a criminal now and in the earlier days was dress as formal as possible for a man in a suit is not suspect of crimes. This is when I learned clothes have meaning, you dress a certain way it says something about you. (This incident was one that happened pre the luxury hoodie)
Looks stylish, he is stylish
‘A man of composure and confidence is a man that knows who he is and where he’s heading’
When you’re somewhat stylish people smell that on you, why? Because when a man is concerned with the finer details of the garments he decides to wear; each things has purpose and ties what he’s wearing together it set off an array of signals which say. That guy knows what he’s doing & the way you walk and the way you carry yourself follows soon after.
Having composure in your attitude and confidence in who you are as a person, has people believe what you want them to believe about you whether you’re wearing a t-shirt or a button-up the way the outfit is pieced together is the point not the individual pieces but the harmony and cohesiveness of the outfit from colour to detailing to cut and fit addressing all of these in an outfit pours into everything else you do.
Wear your clothes – don’t have them wear you
There is no shortcut to this style game. Essential Style is the first hurdle, Essential Style is what you gather when you have no money in the bank but you make things work anyway.
You’re able to pieces together what you want from simpler items , having your fit cost less that £200 but have you feeling more than a Thousand — but that’s only if you let it have you feel that way. Unless you create clothes and want to understand the difference between expensive fabric or the highest grade fabric and the cheaper more unrefined fabric (which takes years of testing) that is only when one could say this garment is not for me.
Whatever garments you do wear there should be an understanding of where it came from and what it represents which is why labels and brand names became so important, how you can tell the difference in a garment that’s machine made; made in a sweat shop; or hand sewn. Whichever of those represents you the best should inspire you to wear those.
The garments you buy are yours they represent you so in buying one you feel confident in the quality and what the label stands for so you should be your most confident within it, if you’re not confident one of the two is misaligned and you’re buying something frivolously
There is no shortcuts
people can try to buy all the the most expensive in season pieces and still find a way to look corny in a fit costing upwards of £5000. All because they never addressed essential style does what I’m wearing go together is what I’m wearing really what I want to have on my body? Is what I’m wearing representative of how I like to be seen?/ how I feel? Those questions left unanswered are all of the corny guys on Instagram wearing expensive fits but nothing looks good it’s all hype not high! No taste, will have you looking like a flop but hubris can carry you all the way.
Don’t let your clothes wear you
This in itself is a sin. As men we have only but so many clothing options so having your clothes eat you up like a Venus fly trap and getting the dreaded ‘it doesn’t suit you like that’ or ‘I like I but just not you in it’ outside of the gracious ‘you look good’ or ‘you’re really killing it’ is a carnal sin. Ever saw another person wear the exact same thing and it look better on them? I haven’t, I couldn’t even think it. I wear it, I feel my best. I wouldn’t wear something because it’s expensive or because someone asked me to. It’s dreadful, I’ve been dressing myself since I was seven other people telling me what I can and can’t wear makes me sick – so I learned exactly what needs be for it to never occur – I never want my girlfriend to think something looks better on another man that I myself wore. Heartbreak. But that doesn’t need to be you, you could have your values in a different place. For me and my level of commitment my clothes are for me – soon to be by me – and my style exists to please me.
We’re learning more of
Whatever Moves Your Dial
Damilare. Not Your Typical
If you enjoyed this please check out More of My Dialogues
To learn more about Owning Your Own Ship – OYOS